Monday, November 27, 2023

not trying to blend

What if I am cringy
A background player
That everyone laughs at
Self aware that I dont fit in
But also comfortable in myself
And that confidence shines through
Because I don't hate myself
I'd rather embrace my awkward
Than chase someone else's ideal 
And maybe some people mock me
But that tells me who they are
It doesn't affect who I choose to be.

Monday, November 20, 2023

not dying today

My symptoms aren't acute
They're persistent and uncomfortable 
Just not urgent or life threatening
I have treatements that work
Not a cure but a way to manage
And succesfull lifestyle changes
That make my symptoms less
But you can't call me healthy
I live with symptoms everyday
I'm surviving, not thriving
Some days are less pain 
But I can't imagine pain free
Inot well but I'm also not dying today.

Monday, November 13, 2023

not a brave face

In a culture where tough is praised
And showing pain is weak
Then I'm considered a whiner
Because sometimes I name it
Instead of living in painful silence
I defy loneliness and issolation
Take comfort from those around me
By bravely sharing my vulnerability
Admitting that living sometimes hurts
Speaking up can't remove pain
But it can make it more bearable.

Monday, November 6, 2023

not about you

My house is my comfort
It should fit my needs
I keep it up to my standards
I don't clean for guests

I live in my body
My asthetic is for me
And clothe it as I please
I don't dress for strangers

My behavior is my choice
My choices may not work for you
I have to live with my consequences
And I don't require your approval

Sometimes my actions effect you
And that is when you get to care
But I still keep these boundaries 
My life choices don't disrespect you.