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Monday, January 23, 2023

suffocating lies

Your lies hurt me
Like a slow growing mold
Hidden in the walls of my house
Maybe you think you are saving us
From the harm of conflict
But I know something is not right
The dank smell of what's unsaid
Chokes me as I try to breathe
Maybe you're protecting yourself
From the sting of my disappointment 
But you're infecting our world
I'm woozy from the inconsistancy
Think of how nice an open door is
Sharing vulnerability is a calm breeze
Give me a chance to forgive you
Instead suffocating in shame.

Monday, January 16, 2023

your ugly is showing

It's hard to see you
Going back to your life
As if the world is normal
While a pandemic is thriving

We don't need those old Ugly Laws
To force us undesirables inside
All we need is your disinterest  
And a mass disabling event

So I wear my mask and stay inside
While you celebrate a return to life
An hope I never meet that fated day
When your disinterest will infect me.

Monday, January 9, 2023

unreliable

Despite my best intentions
All my effort to be organized
My body is unreliable
You can't count on me

Never know when my health will fail
Or when I won't remember detail
Can't say what days I won't be present
Or predict how many hours I can offer

If there were a habit I could cultivate 
I've spent a lifetime searching for it
I do the best with what I'm given
And aim to be as reliable as I can.

Monday, January 2, 2023

keeping it to myself

If I share my discomfort
With someone unfamiliar
Then I end up comforting them
Because their uncomfortable

They can say terrible things
Like, "I'd die if I were you."
I'm burdened with educating them
That may people live like I do

It's easier to fib with, "I'm good."
Than to convince them, "I'm fine."
I've learned to survive and accept
My flawed body and mind.